by: Elli Batchelor

Death, as a process and state of being, has always been a concept that has mystified and intrigued me. As a person who has never subscribed to any organized religion, I do not have a vision of an afterlife that brings me any semblance of comfort or sort of crutch to depend on when faced with the imminency of death. Thus, I have always been deeply infatuated with different interpretations of life’s conclusion, especially of what comes after, and I tend to gravitate towards media that includes a thematic exploration of this concept.

Dickinson does not shy away from death in her poetry, which is what makes her one of my favorite poets. “I Heard a Fly Buzz – When I Died” is a forever favorite of her work and one I often dwell on despite its relative simplicity. The poem begins with the following stanza:

I heard a Fly buzz – when I died –

The Stillness in the Room

Was like the Stillness in the Air –

Between the Heaves of Storm –

From the perspective of the person who passed, Dickinson imagines the transitional period between life and death. With so many potential directions for this concept, it is interesting that the focus is shifted to a fly, rather than something broader and more abstract. The presence of an annoying pest disturbing the solemnity of a funeral procession is both ironic and brings about a sense of mundanity, which I honestly find refreshing. Instead of focusing on the dramatics of death, it is simplistic and normalized. I have always especially liked the opening line’s juxtaposing statements, as there should be no sensation after death and the speaker’s death thus comes as a surprise. The matter-of-fact and casual tone contributes to this as well. I have always been a big proponent of normalizing death, and I am even in a class about it now, yet Dickinson does it in such an artful and effective way that leaves me in awe every time. The idea of stillness between “Heaves of Storm” also sticks with me no matter how many times I read it, since I imagine it as both the literal “calm before the storm” and the pause between labored breaths. As the speaker dies, they are no longer breathing and can only hear the fly’s buzz. I appreciate its attention to the sensory experience, so I can imagine myself taking the place of the dying person. 

The Eyes around – had wrung them dry –

And Breaths were gathering firm

For that last Onset – when the King

Be witnessed – in the Room –

I willed my Keepsakes – Signed away

What portion of me be

Assignable – and then it was

There interposed a Fly –

Here, Dickinson shifts her attention to the funeral’s visitors, who have finished grieving and are ready to depart. “The King” she references is likely God, and the funeralgoers await his presence in the room. Personally, I imagine this as the way society views dying, as an entirely solemn, dramatic process that involves the presence of a higher power or savior. Instead, a fly disrupts the peace and the speaker’s musings about their will. The fly taking the place of God in the room is just a little bit silly and is yet another tactic of de-glorifying death. I can almost feel the annoyance of the speaker, and for a poem about such a taboo topic, it feels like the perfect balance. It makes me wonder if I too will be cognizant of such things when I die and if I can be stirred by something as mundane as a pesky fly. 

With Blue – uncertain – stumbling Buzz –

Between the light – and me –

And then the Windows failed – and then

I could not see to see –

This last stanza is one of my favorites. I specifically adore the line, “With Blue – uncertain – stumbling Buzz”. It is really enjoyable to read aloud and the description finally qualifies the sound of the fly, to the point that I can picture the scene in my head. Yet, the descriptors are not typically associated with sound, which makes this especially interesting. Her signature dashes also mimic the uncertainty of the speaker and the fly, which makes the poem a sensory experience in multiple dimensions.  

Dickinson’s poems are instantly recognizable and I appreciate how she has truly carved out a distinct artistic voice for herself. However, what I appreciate most about this one is her ability to tackle something as widely stigmatized as death, and explore its ramifications in a beautifully casual way. As a lover of all things Gothic, I will always revisit this poem.